Next Monday I’ll be turning 28 years old. The following is a list in which I reflect on my most memorable birthdays. To those birthdays that were actually decent and not on the list, I apologize…I’m almost 28 and my long term memory has faded.
5.) 8th… or 9th? Birthday Party Highlights- Backyard cookout & gathering with friends and family. Nothing really sticks out about this birthday other than my mom learned a very valuable lesson for future parties. Piñatas…don’t…come…filled…with…candy. Yes, those delicious treats that fall when you give your final whack to that donkey, yeah, those treats cost money and should be purchased, filled, and sealed prior to the stick attack. Result: Confused and candy-less children.
In reality: Mild disappointment
In my mind:
4.) 11th…or 12th? Birthday Party Highlights- If you know me, I’m not a huge pool person…but for some reason I begged my parents to rent out the local pool for me, my softball team, and my closest friends. I don’t remember actually swimming that much…but I do remember my Lady Days / Aunt Flow / My Monthly Visitor making her appearance. I’ll always remember my mother’s sage advice, (correct or otherwise) “Your period goes away in the water, just get in the pool.”
In reality: Everyone else was busy running around, swimming, and eating pizza.
In my mind:
3.) 5th…or 6th? Birthday Party Highlights- Friends and neighborhood kids came over for food and backyard games. No Piñata, but “Pin-the-Tale on the Donkey”, and some weird marshmallow/licorice eating race. I honestly don’t have actual memories of this party…but I have VHS records! Watching this tape last year showed me just how much my parents put into all of my birthdays. The games, the food, and the headaches of multiple brats running around. Regardless, I’m pretty sure I got an awesome new Barbie at this party (because I basically got a Barbie every year…and that rocked) so I imagine I was a pretty happy camper. Based on the video, it looked like a hodgepodge of loud kids, blindfolded spinning, and a minor choking issue with the marshmallow game.
In reality: Successful birthday with games
In my mind:
2.) 21st Birthday Party Highlights- Summer before my senior year at Ohio University in my dilapidated, unfurnished, overpriced, off-campus house. Bar crawled with my favorite friends. Had lots of “Hot Nuts” (a drink at Tony’s, look it up.) Rested for 3 hours and then got picked up at 7am for a family vacation drive to South Carolina. Passed out between Ohio and North Carolina. Quickest drive to the Carolinas ever.
In reality: Normal Athens night out
In my mind:
1.) 27th Birthday Party Highlights- The Friday before my birthday, balloons were sent to my office (because balloons are 100% better than flowers) by my boyfriend. We had an amazing dinner at Hatfield’s in L.A. Bling Bling $$$$. On my actual Birthday day, I splurged on an In N’ Out double double, fries, and drank champagne in my garage studio with my awesome boyfriend.
In reality: Lovely dinner, quiet evening.
In my mind:
Honorable Mention: I consulted with my best friend (since she’s attended almost every birthday since we were five) to help me remember my parties. Here are her highlights:
– “She stepped in puke at Magic Mountain” (mid 90s)
– “We were too young to appreciate the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame” (late 90s)
-“That time we ‘camped’ out in your back yard, heard a noise and all ran inside for the night…except for that one girl we left outside sleeping.” (late 90s)
-“I’m pretty sure by high school we just went golfing together.” (mid 2000s)
Personal Honorable Mention: 25th Birthday Party Highlights- Friends, drinks, bars, Russian strip club, two lap dances, and a fall. First L.A. birthday and one for the books.
So, here’s to 28! Let’s see what you’ve got…
Leave a Reply